Possession #118 - Snow Shovels

Hot and humid today. I'm thinking perhaps that I can pack up the snow shovels for the season. Yes, the new snow blower does the heavy lifting, but the old fashioned (plastic)shovel still has to do its share of the winter work. I'm also thankful for my driveway that's as fourth as long as my last one.

It does seem at times that we all spend much of our lives moving nature from one spot to another - shoveling snow, mowing grass, pumping water, raking leaves, moving dirt, rocks and mulch. Why can't we just leave all this stuff where the Lord put it? It's all about "taming" nature so that we can have our way with it. Nature, however, seems equally intent on reminding us from time to time that it is untameable.

Possession #117 - Wagon

I don't have many possessions from childhood, but this is one of them. I remember taking daring rides on this wagon down the steeply sloping street near my house. When I was older, it took a real beating when my brother and I hitched it to the backs of our Schwinn 3-speed bikes for the purpose of delivering the extra thick Sunday morning paper. My dad has tried some restoration, but the wagon's solid rubber wheels are almost down to the metal rims and some of the steel parts are simply gone. I'm tempted to say something about the simplicity of old toys and the needless complexity of modern ones, but it seems terribly self-serving and I don't want to engage in generation-bashing...but.....

Possession #116 - Table Saw

There ought to be a few men out there in Facebook land doing a Tim Allen grunt as they see this picture of a nice Delta Table Saw. It's the centerpiece of my fix-it corner of the garage. Mostly, of course, it gathers dust. But occasionally the tools all come out and something spectacular happens. Today, for instance, a stair rail got installed without any major injuries to my body or the home. I think it's important for many of us to doing something of concrete worth occasionally. Those who farm or build houses or repair cars, probably don't need this. But for those of us whose jobs revolve more around words than a toolbox, we need a chance to work with our hands and do something that requires drills, screw drivers and table saws. When I finished the stair rail...there was ...well... a stair rail. It's nice, really, to check something off the list that you know won't creep back on the last in the middle of the night...or some committee won't vote to change the specs that are on the list. It's done and over. Time to pack up the tools until the next home repair adventure.

Possession #115 - Boomerangs

In college, for a brief time (about 5 minutes) I was an athletic superstar. I won the one and only boomerang competition. I took a just-for-fun course on how to make and throw boomerangs and at the end we had an actual contest and yes... I got the thing to come back to me without knocking myself out. I learned a few things too. Like the scientific principles involved in explaining how a boomerang actually does what it does are way beyond me. Try a wiki answer... I also learned that the original boomerangs weren't built to return. Returning boomerangs are more for recreation. And they are wonderfully entertaining, especially watching someone else!

Anyway, these are a couple of my boomerangs that I keep around. You might want to check out a couple of Aussies trying to get the boomerang to circle back and knock a water bottle of their head. That's something you ought to try!

Possession #114 - Golf Clubs

When I was young, my father used to take my brother and I golfing with him. He'd hand us a club and a ball and we'd whack our way around the course. When we were older we lived near a golf course where we'd play now and then. I remember playing in only one tournament and the only shot I remember from it was the one in which the golf club flew out of my hand and went further than the ball. After Jean and I were married we bought each other a set of clubs for our birthdays. Since then we've been semi-sort-of-committed-part-time-golfers. I've got a new set of clubs now which I've accumulated from a variety of used sporting gear stores. None of them match which seems appropriate for the kind of game I play. At least, I tell myself, the worse you are the more exercise you get. Humility and fresh air are two gifts of golf that I'll always enjoy.

Possession #113 - Another Puppet

It's time for another puppet from my vast collection. This one started out as a moving mouth puppet made in Britain, and then I modified it for various purposes. Most recently he accompanied Dr. Schnickenschnauser as his ventriloquist dummy assistant, Dr. Do-little. I don't pretend to be an expert ventriloquist, but it's really quite fun. Think about it...you get to have rollicking conversations with yourself. Your dummy can make all the incriminating comments while you get away scot free.

I am a huge fan of other ventriloquists who do the artform more justice. I suggest Nina Conti who may not be well known to many folks. But she does a lot with very few "special effects. Here's a clip of her and Monk. Enjoy!

Possession #112 - Fence

Don't believe a word of it when the small aliens in your house say something like, "We promise we'll walk it every day!" It isn't true. It's a big fat lie. But you'll fall for it every time and you'll be glad you did...most of the time. But a dog did require one major handyman project... to construct a fenced-in area. If I'd thought about it ahead of time, I probably wouldn't have undertaken it. But I thoughtlessly gathered the equipment and supplies and dove in. It mostly works except for the time I was sitting in my office looking out the window and thinking how the dog walking down the sidewalk looked exactly like my dog. It was. She scrambled through a weakness in our defensive perimeter. They say fences make good neighbors. All I know is that fences keep all the poop in our yard.

Possession #111 - Ping Pong Table

I remember the Christmas several years ago when I had the brilliant idea of giving our kids a ping pong table. What kid could resist?....mine of course. They hardly played enough to keep the dust off it. Then our son's first year of college and he learns how to what?....play ping pong! This, from the king of video games. Go figure. The only thing less predictable than kids are...ummm...nothing. We fool ourselves into thinking we know other people when in reality we barely scratch the surface of those who we know the best. Well intentioned plans flop. Unthoughtful mistakes rise to prominence. This is the pattern life often takes. It reinforces one's humility...if it needed any more reinforcing. Now....to go and lose another game to my son....

Possession # 110 - Food in the Pantry

As I tried to figure out how to depict all the food in our house I kept thinking of a series of photographs published in Time magazine that showed families from around the world sitting with all the food they happen to have in the house. It's an enlightening series of photographs. Given the honesty of those photographs, mine seems a bit deceptive. This of course, does not represent all the food in my house. I was too lazy to take everything out of the pantry. This is a representative sample of the stuff in there. And it doesn't include any of the food in the fridge and freezer. Despite this relative abundance of food in my house at all times, it's amazing how often we look in the kitchen and say, "...we have nothing to eat."

Jesus once said that our salvation depends almost completely on how good a job we do sharing our food (this version of salvation, of course, isn't very popular among us wealthy Christians). One can only imagine God's impatience at constantly seeing half the world struggling to get a handle on over-indulgence, while the other half (3/4s) struggles to get enough.

Possession #109 - Journal

I am a journal writer. Not consistently. I'll go weeks, months, even a couple years without writing anything. Then, I'll write every day for awhile. I probably have a accumulation of 20-30 journals beginning with one from grade school. I've tried writing journals on computer and ipad, but I find it almost impossible. For such things, I'm a paper person. I've always had a thing for nice paper and a perfect pen. I'm one of those persons that needs the right tactile feel and flow of pen and paper - never pencil.

My journals, like this blog I suppose, are personal, but not too much so. My personality allows some amount of revelation, but holds something back even if I'm writing it just for myself. I suppose I should get that psychoanalyzed, but I don't think I'd ever be able to open up enough to a therapist. There you go...that's just about enough personal information for now. I gotta go write in my journal.

Possession #108 - Corkscrew

Before I figured out a better method I used to mangle wine corks until parts of it ended up floated in the wine. Then I learned how to hold the bottle between my feet and pull the cork without knocking myself out. I know there are lots of high tech wine cork "extractors" but this wonderful little device has served me well and gets the job done without too much damage to the bottle, my body or my ego.

In the Gospel of John, making wine is just about the first thing Jesus does when he comes of age. That's always seemed quite a fine way to make one's entry into the world. And even though some religious leader accused Jesus of drinking too much, I think he probably knew how to make his guests feel welcome... I can't make the wine...but I can open the bottle...and that's enough

Possession #107 - Mailbox

Yes, we have one of these...ummm...what do you call these things? I recall a time when I used to use it quite a bit. In fact, I remember a few times when I almost lived next to it waiting for something to arrive. These days, it does deliver a lot of junk and bills, but not a whole lot else. I hardly ever send a letter. I send things via...well, this thing. And yet, I'm old enough that there's still a bit of a thrill to receiving an actual piece of paper that existed in real time and space somewhere else and now comes to my door. But mostly, well, there's a reason they call it "snail mail."

This does make me wonder if we are too addicted to speed. You know that commercial, "Which is better? Faster or slower?" Even kids, apparently, know that faster is better. But even though we usually seek the faster way, I have a hard time calling it better. Isn't it also true that most of us long for a moment in which we can "slow down?" Don't we want to exit out of the "fast lane" and opt out of the "rat race?" There is a sense within us that things are moving too fast and unless we intentionally practice doing some things slower, we might lose touch with such values completely.

Possession #106 - Massage Chair

OK, so some of your possessions are totally unnecessary and yet you just gotta have em. I do have lower back issues, and I love this heated chair with "magic hands"...but I suppose I don't really need it. It's just that, well, I'm in the grip of the "gottahaveits". Excuse me now while I plug this thing in...

Possession #105 - Cookbooks

Some people can't ever have enough cookbooks. And certainly the opportunity abounds to acquire them. Even though we are far from being cookbook-philes, they do seem to take up a rather large space on our pantry shelf. There are a couple of old standbys. The Betty Crocker and Better Homes and Gardens books both have their covers half mangled and numerous missing pages. We've avoided the newer editions of these books because they just don't have the right stuff in them. We did buy the new Joy of Cooking and ditched the one we inherited from my mother in law. There are a few other specialty cookbooks on the shelf many of which we only use for one irreplaceable recipe in the book, like our to-die-for cornbread concoction, the greatest coffee cake in the world and a doable hummus recipe. But the biggest niche in our collection is definitely the church cookbook. This venerable tradition preserves hundreds of favorite family recipes that are generally more down-home than gourmet. They tend to have recipes that include jelly beans, marshmallows and corn flakes more than turmeric and rice vinegar. Being from an extended family of pastors and churchgoers, these cookbooks just show up at our door quite frequently. And we love 'em!

Possession #104 - Remote Control Car

With great wisdom my wife gave me this car as I went in for an extended hospital stay. It was one of the things that kept my sanity during long days recouping in bed. Sometimes frivolous distraction is just what we need. My theory is that you're never too old to play with toys. They fire our imaginations and keep our minds active. Here's to hoping you have enough toys to keep yourself going on long stress-filled days!

Possession #103 - Coffee Mugs

My theory is that when you're younger, you collect T-shirts. When you get older - Coffee mugs. They serve the same purpose: Mildly utilitarian while reminding you of some person, place or event. We have your typical collection of mugs: Christmas presents, birthday presents, trip to Starbucks, Church anniversary mug, etc... Like t-shirts, you always have far more mugs than you usually need at any one time. Our mugs make their way through a life cycle: front shelf, back shelf, top shelf, garage sale.

I generally prefer a mug for my all-round drinking receptacle. It will hold warm and cold drinks is is just the right size to feel comfortable in the hand. It doesn't easily tip over and you can pick a different one according to your mood of the day.

Possession #102 - Tea

I know it's not politically correct to say it but I like....well...tea better than coffee. Some of that has to do with my inability to have caffeine which takes all the fun out of coffee. But tea...tea still has the really yummy herbal stuff. Hot tea on a cold winter night is just the thing to help you relax. Cold tea on a hot summer day is just the thing to get you going. How does it do that? I don't know...it's magic!

"We Lucky Few" is a wonderful book of interviews with local WWII vets. It gives a view of the war that's personal and moving. One small detail that sticks out for me today... numerous vets who served in the field in Europe mentioned the British and their...TEA! Americans were either amazed, horrified or baffled by the British soldiers who would seemingly stop in the middle of the war, no matter what, to make a pot of tea. Perhaps it made the experience more bearable. Maybe it connected them with home. Maybe it just tasted good. Chinese laborers who helped build the transcontinental railroad in the American West were less susceptible to disease because they drank tea which effectively purified the water. Tea...it does a body good.

Possession #101 - Hair Clippers

OK...OK...get it out of your system right now!...what do you need hair clippers for!? The truth is, a couple years ago I started moaning about how much it cost to have a professional cut my hair. The "per hair" cost must have been astronomical. Then it occurred to me...I can do this. How hard can it be? And so I bought my own clippers and with the aid of my bathroom mirror I clip away.

OK...so hardly anyone even notices... in fact, for awhile my family had a contest - the person who even noticed that I got my hair cut first won a big prize. But every time I keep the cash in my wallet that used to go to the hair place, I smile and thank my clippers.

Possession #100 - Spring Skunk

Back to another of my puppet collection. This one is "Stinky" who used to accompany Dr. Schnickenschnauser on his rounds. "Stinky" is what's called a Spring Puppet which means that rather than putting one's hand inside, you manipulate an inner spring from the outside. If you want to see an expert manipulate this kind of puppet, watch this crazy french dude.

I've gotta say that there's not much more fun to be had in life than bringing a puppet like "stinky" into a bunch of kids and goofing around. But you have to make sure you're with kids that are younger than the age of cynicism... (it gets younger all the time).

Possession #99 - Pants

Pants. Yeah, I got plenty of pants. My Question: why can't jogging pants become the accepted apparel of the working person? Yes, pants have pockets which make them handy for holding stuff. But otherwise they never quite fit right. Maybe I need to move to Hawaii and wear burmuda shorts all year round.

I once asked a bunch of youth if they felt that pear pressure played a roll in what clothes they chose to wear. Of course, they all resoundingly denied that it affected them even though every one of them looked almost identically clad. Adults aren't a whole lot different. Even though we like to think of ourselves as unique and self-determined, we are vulnerable to just as many fads and pressures as a teenager. Fortunately, I've never been in danger of being much of a trend setter. So, I'll settle for my rather pedestrian pants.

Possession #98 - Patio Chairs

Another sign of spring? Not the wintry mix we're getting today... but the patio furniture is dusted off and out from its winter hibernation. There are four people chairs and one plastic chair as chewed up as an old bone that the dog claims as her own on many afternoons spent in the sun.

"Henry builds a Cabin" is a children's book by D.B. Johnson. In this wonderful picture book, Henry (a bear inspired by Henry David Thoreau) builds what appears to be a cabin too small for him. But as he explains to his friends, the outdoors are all a part of his "home." He doesn't need everything to be inside the cabin. I like the same thing to be true about my own home. The patio, the yard and the porch are important parts to the home. And I'd much rather spent time out than in (except on days like today...cold and rainy).

I hope you get to enjoy your outside home soon!

Possession #97 - Coats

Today started out in the 80's and now is digressing in the 30's...and on May Day for heaven's sake! So, I guess it was time to truck all my coats out of the closet for one last hurrah.

Jesus once said that if a person asked for your shirt, you should give them your coat. But then again, he lived in the Middle East where maybe the climate was more conducive to such generosity. Is the climate ever conducive to generosity? Probably not. There's always a handy excuse to hold on to whatever's making you warm and comfortable. That's the thing. Maturity always goes down the path of discomfort and risk...but that's a hard road to take.

Meanwhile, I've got far too many coats for me to use personally. I need to find someone without a shirt.